Give up sex! The thought of giving up anything with the word sex in it might feel like sacrilege to you, but if you have been thinking about treating yourself to some great socks on the regular and starting your own sock subscription, you may be surprised at how much it changes your life—for the better. Here are five reasons why you should give up sex and start your own sock subscription today.
1) You will never have sex again
You know what's better than sex? Cool socks. It's like, if you're not having sex, you might as well have fun with your feet. And cool socks for men are plentiful. There are so many kinds: dress socks, colorful socks, ankle socks, crew socks, crazy color sock club--the list goes on! Plus it's cheaper than going out on dates or paying for a prostitute
2) No more morning hangovers
Those dreaded morning hangovers are often the result of drinking too much alcohol the night before. Waking up with an awful headache, feeling sick, or just feeling exhausted is never fun.
But it doesn't have to be that way! Drinking tons of water before going to bed, not mixing your drinks (alcohol + caffeine), and limiting yourself to one drink per hour are all great ways to avoid getting that morning hangover. And if you do happen to wake up with one, try drinking some of those crazy colorful socks for men and get back in bed for a nap.
3) The sex of the socks doesn’t matter
Your life is all about the pursuit of happiness. Do you want to be happy right now or do you want sex? It's an age-old question that, if we're being honest, is actually quite difficult to answer. Sure, we can engage in both activities but they are not mutually exclusive. That being said, why not put your time into something that will make you feel better in the long run? And while we're at it, why not get something out of it too? That's where our sock subscription comes in. We'll send you five pairs of awesome socks each month - including some crazy color dress socks for men - for just $12.99 per pair! What more could you ask for?!
4) Everyone will be jealous
There are many reasons why you should consider giving up sex and devoting your life to cute socks. Firstly, they don't nag you or complain when you're watching the game instead of paying attention to them. Secondly, they never give you any complaints about not wanting kids. Thirdly, they always want sex with no insecurities about whether you're attracted enough. Fourthly, there is no chance of children being conceived from having sex with socks. Fifthly, there is no chance of catching any STDs from having sex with socks. Sixthly, there's never a chance that socks will leave on their own accord because they got bored.
5) Free shipping
1) We offer free shipping both ways. 2) The socks arrive at your door in less than two weeks. 3) If you ever have any questions or concerns, we're always happy to help! 4) We have the best sock of the month club, so you can always be sure you'll get fresh pairs sent right to your door every month. 5) With our gift socks for men, it's easier than ever for you to buy a gift that will really wow your guy. 6) Our fun mens ankle socks are perfect for dressing up an outfit with style. 7) Our crazy socks club is especially great if you like trying out new styles that are outside of the box.