10 Reasons You Should Give Up Sex and Devote Your Life to Cute Socks
When you subscribe to a sock of the month club, you’ll not only be able to enjoy new socks every month, but you’ll also take care of your feet better than ever before. Here are ten reasons you should give up sex and devote your life to cute socks.
1. They don't tell you when you're doing something wrong
I'm not sure how I got here. Maybe it was from too many months of trying to find the perfect gifts for my friends, family, and co-workers. Maybe it was from all the hours spent browsing the internet for the funniest socks on earth. Maybe it was because I love buying things that make people happy--and what makes someone happier than a new pair of socks? Whatever the reason, I started subscribing people to monthly sock clubs. I thought this would be a great way to give back by giving everyone something they wanted: new socks!
But no one ever said thank you. No one ever told me they loved their new month of cool socks or that they had even noticed them at all.
2. They never complain about your cooking
The first three reasons you should give up sex for socks is that they never complain about your cooking, they always go out of their way to let you know if it's not what they want, and they'll never ask you for anything. The next six reasons are: they're always there when you need them, they're happy with any outfit, they make a great best friend, they make you laugh at least once a day, the best gift is a pair of ankle socks in your favorite color every month (which means socks), easy laundry because all the colors match with each other. They also never have lice or other gross stuff that might happen on sex.
3. They always look nice on your feet
You might be wondering why I'm telling you to give up sex. Well, it's not that we think you should give up sex forever. It's just that there are some great socks out there that can help you stay happy and comfortable all day long. So if you're interested in trading up your sex for something better, read on for 10 reasons why you should give up sex and start a new life devoted to the simple pleasures of cute socks.
1) Mens purple ankle socks make any outfit more professional looking. They always look nice on your feet whether they're paired with dress pants or jeans. 2) Mens colorful socks also make any outfit more fun!
4. They are often more fun than their owner
If you're looking for a new hobby, or want to make an easy switch in your life, then it's time to give up sex. And I don't mean give it up for Lent--I mean for good. But why? The answer is simple: socks. Men's socks are a fun way to break the monotony of everyday life, no matter what kind of day you're having. Whether you need a little pick-me-up or just want some fun colors in your life, men's colorful socks can help you get there. They're also great for gifting if you have friends that always seem down lately--just send them some crazy color dress socks and they'll be back on their feet in no time!
5. Everybody notices them and wants a pair
It's no secret that socks are one of the most overlooked pieces of clothing in your closet. They're often shoved into the back of a drawer or tossed on the floor when you take off your shoes. But, let's be real- socks are awesome! And you don't have to spend a lot of money on them either. With so many options out there, it can be hard to choose what socks will best suit your needs.
That's why we created The Great Sock ClubTM, an awesome sock subscription service with new colors every month! We know how tough it is to find cool socks for men so we made it easy for you!
What exactly is The Great Sock Club?
6. No strings attached
Are you ready for a sock revolution? Men's socks have come a long way from being utilitarian. From awesome, colorful ankle socks to form-fitting crew socks, the options are endless. At Rader & Company, we believe that you should never have to worry about getting a gift for your man ever again. Women everywhere are jumping on the bandwagon because who doesn't love cute socks? Plus, you'll never worry about what he will or won't like as an anniversary present or Christmas present ever again because our men's sock of the month club has got your back! We've even got personalized dad gifts with photos of your little one's face printed on some really cool crew ankle socks so you can surprise him with something he'll love but never thought he wanted.
7. No awkward silences on dates
The best socks of the month club is a great way to explore the world of men's socks while giving up sex. We'll send you an awesome sock every month, so you don't have any awkward silences on dates. All with free shipping!
8. You can take them anywhere, anytime, even swimming with you!
Socks are the perfect accessory for when you're on the go. And, with a subscription like the Funky Sock Club, socks are delivered right to your door every month. Plus, our socks come in a variety of colors, patterns, prints and styles so they're perfect for any occasion! From business meetings to a day of swimming at the beach or an outdoor concert - these socks can take you everywhere!
9. They come in every color imaginable
Some people might be thinking, What? No! I need sex in my life! But hear me out. Here are ten reasons why you should give up sex and devote your life to cute socks.
1) The United Nations says that the most pressing issue of our time is climate change. 2) Did you know that just one cow emits the same amount of greenhouse gas as a car does in a year? 3) It takes about 80 calories to produce one egg. 4) Did you know that one sock company produces enough fabric scraps every year for 60 million pairs of socks!
10. Cleaning them takes seconds (and they are so easy to clean)
Here are the top 10 reasons you should give up sex and devote your life to cute socks:
- They last longer than most relationships, so they're perfect for commitment-phobes. - There's no awkward asking for consent, which is especially helpful for drunk hookups. - They require less emotional investment than a partner does. - All the fun of having sex without any of the emotional hassle! - No awkwardly going home together at the end of the night. - They are more comfortable than anything else you'll find in your bed. - When people ask about how your weekend was, you can just tell them that it was awesome socks club instead of going into detail about how much alcohol you drank.